From: Producer: The role played by those persons or client systems that provide the information to be preserved. This can include other OAISes or internal OAIS persons or systems. To: Producer: The role played by those persons or client systems that provide the information to be preserved. This can include other OAISes or internal or external OAIS persons or systems.
Not sure it makes the sentence clearer. The external OAIS person or systems are included in the part "other OAISes". Adding "external" after that, might be confusing to the reader. Maybe the simplest solution is to add external and remove "other OAISes", the sentence would become "This can include internal or external OAIS person or systems."
I think Claire's suggestion is better.
DAI WG agreed with this change on 17 January 2017. The updated definition is: Producer: The role played by those persons or client systems that provide the information to be preserved. This can include internal or external OAIS persons or systems.
I agree with the DAI WG's disposition of this suggested change.